mGa KuRo-KuRo Ni Ka UrO

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around does it make a sound?

I remember our Psychology 101 teacher asking the above question. A lively discussion ensued. Each student giving a different answer. I remember giving out a somewhat scientific answer about sound waves, blah, blah, blah.

Now 25 years later and 17 years of marriage bliss, I’ve come to the conclusion that the answer to the said question is both Yes and No. From the tree’s and air’s viewpoint, yes, sound was produced. But from a person’s viewpoint, since no one was there to hear and record that sound, it was total silence.

To give more relevance to the question allow me to interpret it in everyday context. Sa opis, o sa bahay, kung may nagawa kang maganda, pero wala naman nakaalam nito, nangyari nga ba ito? Sa viewpoint mo, siempre, nangyari ito. Pero sa viewpoint ng iba, parang walang nangyari. Others may benefit from what you did, but since no one knows you did it, you don’t get the credit. Worse, others may even grab the credit. Other people's impression of you remains unchanged.

You see, perception creates impression. You are liked or disliked based on what people know about you. If you want to be liked, make a favorable impression of yourself. Such truth can not be discounted in a husband-wife relationship. Therefore, the husband should always try to make a good impression on the wife.

For instance when doing housework, always make sure that your wife is made aware of what you did. If you washed the dishes or did the laundry without her knowing it, then it’s not counted. Wala kang pogi points kapag ganoon. If you want pogi points, you have to let her know about it. The more pogi points you have, the more likely will she continue to like you. And the best way to let her know about your accomplishments at home is to announce it. You can say “honey, paaandarin ko na ang washing machine”, “love, magsasampay na ako”, etc. In other words, don’t just do the work. Reinforce it by words, to make sure the work doesn’t go unnoticed.

Another secret I've discovered about our wives is that sometimes, enough na na maging thoughtful tayo. Big deal para sa kanila na magpakita tayo ng ating pagiging maaalahanin. Thoughtfulness is not only remembering important dates. Thoughtfulness can be manifested daily.

Let’s say your wife is busy preparing dinner while you are idle, doing nothing. Go over to her and ask her “Sweetheart, anything I can do to help?”. Naks, di ba? Very gentleman ang dating. Wala ka pang ginagawa, may pogi points ka na kaagad diyan. At kahit alam mo naman ang dapat mong gawin, ask ka pa rin. Because by simply asking the question, you’re making sure that whatever happens next, makatulong ka man o hindi, nag-register na sa mind niya na matulungin at thoughtful kang asawa.

Finally, if you are sincere in lending a hand, ask her the question while she appears starting or in the middle of doing the housework. Kung hindi ka naman sincere, hintayin mo kapag patapos na siya sa kanyang gawain bago mo siya tanungin... And hope she doesn't notice. Hehe.

22 Comments:

  • Dear KU,

    for sure dami ka nang pogi points no? Balato mo sa amin itong tips na ito, In a relationship lalo na pag busy ang mag asawa, these kilig words will surely be appreciated by the wifey, and the better half of course, dahil may premyo siya kay misis, yehey!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:02 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • hopefully, di mabasa ni esmi ito. kung hindi buking ang teknik ko.

    By Blogger Ka Uro, at 4:36 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • pag nagkataon na bawat ganda points ay may katumbas na dolyar eh tiyak milyonarya na ako...yun eh kung may asawa ako! hehehe

    By Anonymous vemsan, at 4:52 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • Naku, may natutunan na naman ako. From now on, kapag umutot ako, kahit mahina eh ia-announce ko para walang makaagaw ng credit haha dyok!

    From a woman's perspective naman; just because we don't always acknowledge our hubby's efforts doesn't mean we don't notice. We DO, tututs lang. And syempre, dagdag pogi points talaga yun!

    By Blogger Rhada, at 7:15 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • hmmmp! ang bait namang asawa ni ka uro! or should i say... sip sip! ahahah! peace out!


    pero ang galing nung lesson from the tree! me mga bagay talaga minsan na hindi naten naririnig, di nakikita at hindi nararamdaman kaya ang akala natin wala lang. me favorite akong quote connected dito:

    "don't judge others by your ignorance."

    madalas kase porke hindi naten alam ang bilis nating maghusga. some things remain unrecognized kase tamad rin naman tayong hukayin ang natatagong katotohanan. there could be a sound...that is if we only tried to listen....

    By Anonymous lojik, at 7:27 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • d na pwede gamitin ni hubby teknik na yan saken, kasi nauna ko nabasa kaysa kanya. hehehe.....
    kidding aside, napapansin ko din naman mga magagandang bagay na ginagawa nya, kahit d nya sabihin. ang wish ko lang ay mas maging madaldal hubby ko, kasi tahimik sya.... =)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:27 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • ako po yun...

    By Anonymous cindy, at 9:28 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • fafa alam mo korekek ka.
    Pero yung sabi mo na kapag may nagawa kang maganda at alam mo na walang nakakakitang tao upang bigyan ka ng credit okay lang yun kasi nakikita naman ni Lord ang ginawa mo at dahil doon he will be the one to reward you. Yun namang tao na nagtatake advantage at sila ang kumukuha ng credit bayaan mo nalang sila, bahala na si Lord sa kanila hehehe.

    Dun naman sa housework di naman kaya lalo ka lang mapahamak kung iaanounce mo pa sa wife mo na “honey, paaandarin ko na ang washing machine”, “love, magsasampay na ako”, kasi baka ang isigaw sa yo eh "baket tapos ka na bang maghugas ng mga plato?" "nakapagsaing ka na ba, yung lawn na naasikaso mo na ba? , yung damit na plantsa mo na? hindi ka pa yata tapos sa iba mong gawain eh ...hala doon ka sa kusina" hehehe

    By Blogger KaDyo, at 11:57 PM, June 27, 2006  

  • oppps..andito pala si faffi, buti naman pala at nagbasa na ..ma tsek nga ang resulta mamaya..thanks KU..hehehe.

    By Blogger Ann, at 12:11 AM, June 28, 2006  

  • naku, ganyan din ang asawa ko... rinig na rinig naman ang tubig pag naghuhugas na ako... pero ma-o-offer na siya na lang daw ang maghuhugas pag patapos na ako. hehehe...

    By Blogger JO, at 2:27 AM, June 28, 2006  

  • ngek, baligtad case ko e, kadalasan, si fafa ang gumagawa ng housechores, ako yung sumisigaw ng 't'as besoin d'aide?' (do you need help?) at syempre pa, i ask that pag medyo patapos na sya hehe... kahit pano, me ganda points pa rin naman pala ako.. pero in fairness naman sa kin, i do the ironing and he's not even asking me if i need help ha...

    By Blogger Analyse, at 7:59 AM, June 28, 2006  

  • mga fafas talaga ...naman!!!

    anong tawag doon, TIGASIN???
    jan o, nahuli sa sariling bunganga si KD! hahahah

    By Blogger racky, at 8:18 AM, June 28, 2006  

  • rhada,
    glad to hear that wives acknowlege their husbands efforts at housework. akala ko kasi di ito napapansin eh.

    lojik,
    tama, sipsip lang ako. hahaha.
    ok yung quote mo.

    cindy,
    ikaw na lang ang gumamit nung teknik at huwag mong pabasa ito kay hubby. sabi nila pakainin mo raw ng ano ng baboy para maging madaldal. hahaha

    kd and ann,
    nabibisto tuloy kayo niyan. ang tindi pala ni ann. joks lang

    jo,
    unahan mo na kasi. sabihin mo: "honey, gusto mo palit muna tayo. ako muna manonood ng tv, ikaw na ang maghugas nito". heheh

    analyse,
    bait pala ni french guy.

    racky,
    ganun nga, huling-huli si KD. hahahah

    By Blogger Ka Uro, at 12:35 PM, June 28, 2006  

  • mmm..wala pa ko sa point ng pagiging wife...pero as i see it sa mom ko...you said it right KU!

    nature na talaga siguro ng babae ang pagiging sensitive sa lahat ng bagay..if not oversensitive ha?hehe

    By Blogger ev, at 7:50 PM, June 28, 2006  

  • KU, 17 years. expert ka na sa pagpapapogi at pag-earn ng pogi points. papaturuan ko nga sa iyo bf ko. hehehe.

    By Blogger riadiosa, at 12:05 PM, June 29, 2006  

  • Ang hirap mag comment dito, kc naman si Piolo ko gusto sya lahat ang mag trabaho kahit sa gawaing bahay gusto e nagpapahinga lang ako... parang ala akong silbi eno? pero palagay ko mag sasawa din un,,, ipapamana rin nya sakin ung mga trabahong un pagdating ng panahon.. hehe! kaya ngayon e nag ta-take advantage ako pag ako ang babakasyon...

    By Blogger tutubing_karayom, at 1:20 PM, June 29, 2006  

  • bakit pag ako nagsabi sa asawa ko ng "is there anything i can do to help?" sinisigawan ako ng "Tigilan mo ko sa kalokohan mo ha."

    By Anonymous major, at 4:30 PM, June 29, 2006  

  • good point. simula ngayon bago ako maghugas ng pinggan, maglampaso ng sahig, maglaba, mamalantsa, mamalengke, magluto text muna ako o tawag sa phone kay mrs. para ipaalam sa kanya pag nasa trabaho siya para marami akong pogi points.sa gabi siguradong pasusubukin niya ako ng 3 points play kung kakayanin ko. nice pointer coach. kaya pala mukhang sweet na sweet samahan ninyo ng esmi mo.

    By Blogger atoy, at 9:43 AM, June 30, 2006  

  • Hi...This reminds me also of a philosophical dogma by Emmanuel Kant that says "Everything is not what it seems". Just like in the movies Matrix and Dark City. Perception is such a very strong notion. To some a piece of stone is just but a stone but to others, it is a construction materials or a sling bullet.

    By Anonymous Major Tom, at 6:20 PM, June 30, 2006  

  • K U,

    Hi, nandito na po ako sa Auckland. Pareho din po pala tayo ng obserbasyon at teknik para kay misis...in a subtle manner, dapat malaman ng mga esmi natin na kumikilos din tayo (otherwise they assume na wala tayong ginagawa, either correctly or incorrectly). Very good po yung article ninyo.

    - (Atty.) John a.k.a. Maverick

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:46 PM, July 01, 2006  

  • ha ha ha how amusing ka talaga and very true to life. Natamaan ako ah- but it validates what i am doing. So don't suffer in silence. Make thunder of your actions. very good point, ka uro

    By Blogger VICKY, at 8:21 AM, July 02, 2006  

  • Matthew 6:1-4
    1"Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.
    2"So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 3But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

    By Anonymous Willie, at 7:20 AM, July 06, 2006  

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